How often do you find yourself aggravated at situations, because they aren't necessarily going as your planned or expected? That seems to happen a LOT in my life. I have always had a hard time with patience....
I read a church sign one time that said something to the affect of "Impatience is a form of sin". I have to say that after a lot of thought I can see how that is true. If I believe that there is a God, and I am made in His likeness, then I know that He likes order just like I do. That's why that I have these plans and expectations. So If I believe that He is real, then I should know that even when I'm not seeing the big picture, as long as I'm believing in His plan...patience will be doing it's work, and in the 'world of me' everything will be ok. Even when it doesn't hold the form of 'ok' in my eyes.
It seems like I've been struggling with patience in every possible way, patience and procrastination are my worst problems I think. For example: In this day I would like to do laundry, update this blog, clean the house,work on a new painting, etc., etc. and then welcome my husband with a loving smile when he walks in the door... In reality: When I woke up this morning it was per the request of a 2 and 3 year old, one of which needed a diaper change and the other that immediately was ready to go outside and start riding his bicycle. (This is the part where I should put my own needs/wants aside and get up and begin the Mrs.Brady role of fixing the perfect breakfast, or at least that is my expectation of myself) Then, when I worked up the ability to get out of bed I walk into the kitchen to fix the kids some breakfast an eruption of trash is staring me in the face, as its overflowing the trash can that my husband (in my expectations) was supposed to take out 2 days ago. Now this is the part where my emotions, anger, impatience, etc. are trying to rise up in me....what will I choose to do? As much as I would like to say that I choose the high road most of the time, unfortunately that isn't the case. Because when expectations meet reality I think most of us are left with a feeling of disappointment, which then turns to impatience and other forms of selfishness.
So now that God has shown me this lesson, what do I plan on doing with it? Well, I'm going to try to put it into practice. Take note the keyword in the last sentence is PRACTICE. Meaning my expectation of myself may be that I'm going to get on this new lesson, ride it around while doing cool stunts and tricks. But in reality I can only learn as I go, just as I'm doing right now. So I will probably fail at practicing patience SEVERAL times in the near future. That's where the relationship with God really helps bring a balance in things. When I feel like I'm failing because anger is rising up in side of me, I plan on talking to him about it. If I fail to put a cap on it before I erupt like my trash. I plan on talking to God about it and asking Him to forgive me and help me. Then I will pray that he help me pick up the trash that erupted and take it out. So that I can start out fresh and new.
I am my own worst enemy in a lot of ways, because I see how that my dad is (being impatient and sometimes erupting with anger) I justify my actions saying that I get it from him. When really it's all me. Instead of being mellow, I'm the one that allows myself to get riled up over ridiculous things. Then instead of ACTUALLY doing something about it, I write it off...'I get that from my Dad'. Well today I'm holding myself accountable for my actions and I am going to do something about this!
Prayer for today:
God help me to be the person you see me being. Not the person that I allow myself to be. I want to change my reactions to the things that go on around me, so that it may be a benefit to myself and the people that are around me. Help my expectations of myself, people and things around me to get in the way of your expectations of how I'm supposed to live. HELP, HELP, HELP! AMEN
I'm just a young artist. New to the world of finding venues to share a visual message with the world. I wouldn't be an artist if it wasn't for God's inspiration and I want to do all I can in order to allow Him to have the Glory in my artwork.
About Me
- Worth Love Art
- I'm a 25 year old, mother of two. I have been a homemaker since the birth of my first child. I may seemingly have little to do with the world around me, due to the fact that my impact on the world goes unseen in a lot of ways. I take my job as a mother very seriously though, because it's not one life, mine, thats going to be affecting the world in my eyes, but rather the lives of my children that will make an impact. Therefore I'm doing the best I can, as I learn, to try to teach them how to live meaningful lives. I praise God for everything that I have and especially a newly found ability to paint. If it wasn't for the events good and bad that he's lead me thru and out of in my life I wouldn't be the person I am today. So in everything that I do I pray that He will get glory in it. I'm not perfect so that statement doesn't come with a guarantee, it is just simply a prayer and a hope for my life.
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